Sunday, May 16, 2010
hehe i am being bored and boliao now cos i have nth left to do for the night and i don't feel like sleeping yet haha so here i am again! (: i think my blog helps me sort out my thoughts sometimes haha and uh i dunno haha, it's a very good place to do reflections? (: ok reflections sounds very school-ish and kiddish haha, i dunno la but yeah uh hmmm ok maybe retrospection is a better word (: ah yes so i love coming here to do some retrospection on my life hehe xD
anw, after a nice wonderful day with my dearest fiance, i went home sometime in the evening and then i watched ip man 2 with my mom! ((: it seriously rocks haha now i see why everyone says it's good haha, cos yeah it's really good! (: and it's like haha i dunno, very meaningful (: and haha watching this show makes me really hate those arrogant a_gmo_hs though haha their attitude towards chinese as depicted in the movie really stinks hmph ): though well it's just a movie haha so no need to get too upset also haha (: and ip man is really cool omg i love the way he fights haha sooo cool (: and again, i have to say, i wish i could fight like that haha (i always end up saying this after watching fighting movies haha sometimes i wonder if i'm a girl :p ) but yeahhh it's damn cool la really haha must watch (:
and then after that i was bored so i decided to read my blog archives again haha xD it's really fun la omg (: or maybe i'm so narcissistic that i just really love reading anything written by me or anything written about me haha xD oops :p haha so yeahh anyway this time i started reading my archives starting from j1 haha cos i suddenly felt like i wanted to relive the j1 moments and so yeahh (:
and then i started remembering a lot of things that i would otherwise have forgotten hahaha loads of little little things ((: and well some things just leave behind a bittersweet feeling cos it reminds me of many things that i would rather not have remembered :/ shattered dreams, lost friendships, miserable and sian times, times when people around me made me feel so small and worthless and unimportant like some ragdoll to be cast aside after playtime, while some things give me this great sense of happiness and accomplishment when i read about them now (even though they were blogged about in a damn sian/angsty manner at the time) haha (: some things just make me feel plain nostalgic, some things make me wish that i could live my life over again just to make some amendments in my life, keep myself from deteriorating, keep myself from meeting people i should never have met because they were just not worth meeting, and also to put in more effort in cultivating relationships with those that deserved more of my time and effort just that i was too blind and shortsighted and juvenile to actually realise it... and to rethink all the choices i've made at every stage of my life, things i should have done but never really got round to doing... wow haha that's a really long list oops :p
but yeahhh basically from my recollection of blogposts, well jc was really erm a mess of things and yet it was a really really fun time omg ((: reading about all the harmoc concerts and camps and syf just made me smile haha ((: and like, aiya all those long harmoc pracs and all the endless hw and all the pw meetups that made me so tired and crabby and in a permanently-pissed-off mood actually make me feel like laughing now when i read about it haha cos like, omg i suddenly cant understand why i complained so much about it then, when A level mugging was the purest form of hell ever hahaha and all the rest of the things just pale in comparison alr lah haha, oh wait no sorry, my work as a HR staff was the purest form of hell haha i take back the stuff i just said about A level mugging HAHA :D so yeahh anw, it's amazing how i change perspective so fast right :p and oh oh i have to say this also, reading about all those tough times makes me feel damn proud of myself now haha (: sorry i have to be ego again haha but i just feel so proud cos it shows that i, nicole thio, am super tough ok and i can do anything and everything no matter how pressurising it is cos i am strong and super driven woots (: plus i have great family and friends la haha i won't ever forget all that also haha xD
and reading about all the sweet things my cookie darling says to me on msn makes me smile from ear to ear haha i have to say this la, you have to give it to shanin really haha she's totally oozing sweetness all over omg and i guess that's one of the main reasons why i love her sooooo much yayyy hehehe xD muuacks! ((:
oh and some posts make me miss school cos of the retarded things we always end up doing there hahahaha like random laughing fits and doing stupid things and blahblah haha xD and i miss the fun events like orientation omg and class camp haha and much much more (:
and suddenly a lot a lot a lot of random little things hit me haha and it's like those drama thingys when your life moments start flashing super quickly before you haha (:
and then i see myself at orientation again, dancing the stupid batch dance and getting all mixed up with the dance steps, running around sentosa in the rain, laughing on the 156 in the morning with the super cheesy retarded yitao, playing marg and jin ning while singing the national anthem in the morning haha, we're like pulling each other's hair and blowing hot air at each other, pinching each other, elbowing each other and whatnot hahahah :p and i see ourselves at our first physics tutorial where we start laughing about hair gel HAHA, playing pickupsticks during one of the damn boring chem lectures, sleeping on margaret's shoulder during pe lectures, blah blah haha xD and then i see myself at class camp struggling to climb onto the giant structure, playing cards on the road at night, sitting on the funny boat and splashing water at certain people on the boat AHEM anganshing ahem ahem (it's damn funny when i think about it really haha cos, who would have imagined that somehow this super annoying person who kept bullying me last time would end up being my bf hahaha it's really amazing srsly haha :p ) and then come the times when i'm struggling to stay awake during lessons/harmoc pracs, staying back till late at night for pw, walking along the path towards bishan mrt when some super nice friends (AHEM clement hong) decide to shout boo at me after telling me all sorts of stories about the fetus in the RI bio lab haha thanks ah srsly :p
and then comes the j2 year, and i see myself going to raja block every morning(it's worth the long walks there just for the few mins with my loved one haha ((: ), rushing out tutorials during breaks, staying back till late in the evenings to discuss harmoc stuff with the exco, standing in front of the ensemble to conduct during harmoc pracs, opening my locker after prac to find little surprises inside (the most epic one was the haagen dazs macadamia ice cream haha my darling is the sweetest omg (((: ) haha and i see ourselves at syf and at concert, haha those were memorable times really (: and then came the nightmarish yet fun times haha omg, chionging to the library after school to chope seats in the library, lugging my prelim booklets from the locker, doodling all over anshing's stuff oops :p, munching during mugging breaks, being entertained by ppl like chiak and clement while shing was away for h3 lessons, omg hahaha i can't help smiling to myself haha xD
and there's loads moreee omg ok i haven't really read the archives up to there yet haha i'm somewhere at aug 09 now haha i shall resume another time (: or my brain will get flooded by all the memories hahahaha (:
